On Monday, I’d had enough. The pictures on Pinterest of the ideal family room couldn’t possibly be real. A dad sitting on the floor joyfully playing with his kids- and not an iPhone in sight. Mom might have well been in the background hand washing the last of the china dinner plates from the herbed pork roast and creamy mashed potatoes she nailed (again). The perfect children were actually laughing with each other while they played a board game, not screaming over who gets the Xbox.
When I looked up from my computer screen, I met my reality . .. and felt imprisoned by the carnage left behind from another day of trying.
Trying to fold the laundry basket of wrinkled clothes still on the dining room table since last Wednesday.
Trying to not blow up at the kids in sheer frustration…again.
Trying to shake this deep feeling that I am not enough.
Every day, we face thousands of obnoxious messages designed to prey on our insecurities. Those commercials of joyful kids laughing and playing in the wintery white snow with mom are . . . you guessed it . . . fake. How do I know? Because they’re devoid of the cries for help because someone can’t get unbuckled from their snowsuit and go to the bathroom three minutes after they go outside. There’s no dog sprinting out the open door at speeds akin to a frightened gazelle- again–rendering the UPS man shaking his head and leaving your package in the middle of the driveway. There’s no sink full of pots that only get washed if they are needed immediately.
The reality is: I’m not “enough” by that standard. My home will pretty much always look like the “before” picture–unless 1) I invite friends over and 2) I lock the children and dog in the basement. I will not color code my linen closet or hand paint all my children’s furniture.
So, where do you go when you don’t feel that you’re enough? For starters, stop going to the places that are feeding you a lie. Facebook, Pinterest, TV channels, magazines, even commercials portray a caricature of life–it’s not real. If you feel yourself pulled down by them–put them away for a bit.
No. Your life–my life–doesn’t look like that. But guess what? That’s okay, because that’s not what we’re here for!
I’m here to reflect the love of God to my world, in both big and small ways. So, even though they only stay out for 10 minutes on that cold day, I can take a couple minutes to make my kiddos some Swiss Miss to warm up afterward. If I throw in a couple of stale marshmallows leftover from camping season–All the better! They feel warm–and loved.
I can walk by the laundry basket ONE more time and snuggle next to my husband for 10 minutes on the couch to say “hello” and reconnect. Seriously, I doubt my tombstone was going to say, “Her laundry was never wrinkled” anyway.
In a way, none of us are “enough” because we all need the Lord’s help (Phil 3:14); however, in another way we are enough because He’s given us everything we need to show HIS love to a needy world.
So, take a deep breath and repeat after me, “With God’s help, I am enough.” Oh, and while you’re at it, if you happen to see the UPS man, would you please tell him it’s safe to come to my door again? Thanks.